Broken

We have been home from our vacation to Newfoundland for a week today. What a wonderful time spent with family, despite hurting my foot the second day into our reunion week together. On the second night at the 'lodge', we were swimming, and I made a quick decision to jump into the deeper end of the pool. I crossed my legs under me, and jumped in. Apparently the rule "no jumping in the pool" is there for a reason, as I went straight to the bottom of the pool and hit the side of my foot on the concrete floor. (Yes, there was water in the pool!) As I hobbled around for the remainder of the week, the pain in my foot was a reminder of how often we ignore rules, or rationalize that they are not applicable to us or our situation. We do this not only with man's rules, but also with God's rules and guidelines for our lives. How much easier would our lives be if we obeyed what God is asking for us to do. If we upheld the standards that He has laid out before us. I've heard people talk about the letter of the law vs. the spirit of the law. Somehow I wonder if this is another way to make excuses for not living the way we -as followers of Christ- should be living. I find myself as Paul was, constantly conflicted in what I want to do, and what I do. My prayer is to follow so closely to God that there will be no more me, only Christ in me.

*After a week of hobbling around, I had an x-ray done. I have a bone broken in my foot.

Romans 7 -the Message Version

^14-16I can anticipate the response that is coming: "I know that all God's commands are spiritual, but I'm not. Isn't this also your experience?" Yes. I'm full of myself—after all, I've spent a long time in sin's prison. What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary.

^17-20But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.

^21-23It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

²⁴I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?

²⁵The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.